I am melting from realizing some
unfixable holes in this carton of dreams.
Someone carried down my teenage
ambitions in a sack and slung them
onto the floor. A pack of kids better
off with train tracks than debit cards.
I still suffer those same things that cut me
out of myself: a car full of people I know
passing me by, a whole pot of guilt
bubbling on the back burner, and a
hard on for futile pursuit cartoons.
I went walking through pockets of smoke,
searching the warzone for nostalgia,
and finding those old wants gagged
with a ransom note. I was so envious
it only mattered that I never got a return
or a take away. A girl with nothing
but a word gun, a rock gone rolling.
I want the moments that once belonged
to me and I’ll take them from any teenage girl
who doesn’t see it as a frozen second to seize
Jamie Haddox vehemently believes that a little mud isn't as bad as a bloated politician, a rash you can't hide, a tooth headache, or unrequited love… better to get a little dirty. She is unsure, when it comes to cranes and herons, what law velcros one or unhinges the other. 100 percent of the time, she will choose a leftover hibachi scallop over beans from the garden.
I'm standing in the wind.
We had five years left to cry,
stay in, get things done.
The wordy gurdy stands
quiet in the middle of my head;
missing pieces [with just enough
shine] rubber-banded tog-
Back then, when she rose
from her beach chair, the weave imprinted itself
on the backs of her jiggly thighs.
Who would have carried it this far,
up the crest between watersheds,
then quit before the downhill?
This was your domain.
Pocket jingling a handful of brads, flat pencil behind your ear,
you’d bore through the browsers; pay and go.
When you rose from the sea
the crown of your head
touched the clouds
A conveyor belt delivers mutton and fowl.
Hot meringues suffer and collapse
under my ruthless fork.
His breath tripped over words stuck between his teeth
and tongue as sinewy shoulders curved.
The child stood, small, shivering in her tattered brown coat,
a dented, scuffed brown suitcase gripped in her hand.
mushrooms, beets, carrots, cabbage,
uncle’s ashen face.