“Oh, sorry,” I reply with a neutral expression, though irritated by the gouges in my door. “I look like the artist,” I say, “but I am not him. I’m actually proof of his mastery—a copy sprung from a self-portrait he did a few years back.”
Her hands gripped hard to the textured plastic of the airline seats. The airplane moved forward, slowly, towards the runway. No way to tell how close they were.
“You could still try to make a scene,” Chloe offered. “Get kicked off, maybe.”
Shannon shook her head. “I’ll see it through.”
FILM / Captain Canada's Movie Rodeo / November 2020 / Gabriel Ricard
Gabriel caps off the year with writing about how movies help him stay present in the world for November’s Captain Canada’s Movie Rodeo.
FILM / James Stewart and Cary Grant: Portraying Two Sides of Alfred Hitchcock / Christian Perkins
With films such as Rear Window and Vertigo, Stewart becomes Hitchcock's alter ego with their journey into voyeurism and obsession that helped Stewart to portray a darker side of his cinematic persona but still retain his likeability. . . . With Cary Grant, the films allowed to show his sexual charisma and appeal while the romance was on equal footing.
She carries a rose in her mouth that absorbs blood / turns into a sword when she needs to fight a beast / her horse looks like a robot horse but breathes air and loyalty
Finally, his angel broke the kiss and pulled away from him. He opened his eyes and screamed noiselessly. Bubbles rose from his mouth as he realized it wasn’t wind, but water rushing past him. He had to calm down before he drowned.
an ice tongue sliding down penguin wing
slow melt sugary gas station slushie
Bluebells not offered to her due to snark
the Autumn equinox lies: cold then blister hot
It begins with a colossal UFO in the sky. Next, a Swedish big box store suddenly vanishes. Poof. Into thin air. It’s hard to believe. "Fake news," exclaim millions, as they settle in for another evening with Hannity.
America’s Weirdest Drought?
Flesh-Eating Bacteria Cases on the Rise in the Gulf
Will Your City Reach 100 Degrees?
Postal Worker Cooks Steak on Dashboard to Highlight ‘Inhumane’ Conditions
The principal challenge of human shadowing, the challenge that separates the great from the good, is that human shadows are not allowed to follow the movements of their assigned people, called their “principals”. Rather, human shadows are required to anticipate, to fore-shadow, their principals’ movements. This skill is reputed to be the most difficult to attain among all inanimates, yet evolution has lofted the shadow community into such an advanced state that an estimated ten percent have the ability to foreshadow.
Early on, we discover that these men are in fact demons. We’ve just happened to come by their routine get-together at their favorite place. These demons are old. Despite their disgust of humans, we all apparently share the trait of hanging out in our dotage to drink coffee and talk shit.
Will the world remember my blood
birthed a divine gift? Not a mulberry tree,
but of gore to white.
The ancients were wrong: the acid spit of Cerberus
Breeds not nightshade, but cilantro.
Parsley blooms from the pages of indexed love letters, left in dusty attics
For a minimum of 7 years, nutmeg grows like mold on tombstones
You fancy yourself a scientist
afraid of losing your footing.
You don't believe in magic,
but you are staring at the proof
It's our ninth anniversary, and we thought that we would celebrate by running an entire issue dedicated to science-fiction and fantasy works. We got a lot of submissions for this issue, and I'm really happy about that. Thank you for your support, and thank you for your readership.
The show was ahead of its time in not treating the topic like a joke, except perhaps lightly where appropriate for entertainment that successfully stood beside the message. Matt’s conversations about Rambo diving off cliffs and stitching his own wounds, and athletes being shot up with novocaine and cortisone to make it just one more game, are contrasted with him fielding questions about preparations for George’s baby shower, like whether there should be beige or maroon napkins.
COMICS / Mr. Butterchips / Alex Schumacher / October 2020
No messing around here: vote Donald Trump the fuck out of office.
FILM / Captain Canada's Movie Rodeo / October 2020 / Gabriel Ricard
In this month’s Captain Canada’s Movie Rodeo, Gabriel Ricard explains how he enjoys not knowing everything about film and he’s okay with that. (Don’t be Michael Sheen in Midnight in Paris.) Grab a whiskey and sit for a while as he chats with you about the latest films he’s watched.
Mother says, I’m going to hell.
Daughter says, There’s no such thing.
Mother screams, There’s no such thing? Well, then you’re an atheist! I was right!
“So, you’re the best friend,” the boyfriend says, sliding his arm around the back of Ellie’s chair. I briefly consider how quickly I might grab my steak knife and sever the digits of his right hand now making tiny circles on her shoulder.