Hey, Star Wars fan? Ever wonder where Han Solo got his name from? What’s that? Not once? Well, then it’s hard to know what to make of this year’s Star Wars [copyright Walt Disney Corporation, 2018], which offers us an answer to that question, and many others, we never asked. More pressing questions, such as how Han met Chewbacca, how he got the Millennium Falcon, and does Lando Calrissian fuck droids receive answers, to varying degrees of satisfaction. As an exploration of one of the most beloved film characters ever, it's not much, but as cosplay it’s fairly impressive.

Coralie Fargeat’s feature debut tackles the rape-revenge story with an assured style and precise direction. However, only so much one can done with this marginal genre. On the plus side, Matilda Lutz delivers a strong performance; the film is beautifully lensed with a color palette reminiscent of Mad Max: Fury Road; and gorehounds get their fill of over-the-top violence. Unfortunately, thrills are dampened throughout because Fargeat’s feminist slant utilizes overwrought symbolism and recycled boilerplate dialogue. As a result, Revenge doesn’t offer more than exploitation schlock like I Spit On Your Grave or more refined genre staples such as Ms. 45

I knew the Lord was testin me, but I also knew he had not abandoned me. I watched the trees grow shaggy and buds erupt. The colors and the insects returned. He was resurrecting the world yet again. And if he could do that, year after year after year, I knew I could go on. 

She’s saying something else, but I’m out of reasonable earshot, so it’s socially acceptable to pretend I don’t hear her now. It just so happens I did forget something, not capers, but a sauce for my spaghetti. I’m making dinner for Judy, my wife; she says I don’t surprise her enough. Tonight, I’m proving her wrong.