The Donald Trump Campaign Speech Mad-Lib

Presidential candidate and Real American™, Donald Trump. 

Presidential candidate and Real American, Donald Trump. 

Hey, kids! Celebrate the candidacy of the only Real American™ in the 2016 Presidential race by building your own campaign speech, in the in-your-face, tell-it-like-it-is, insult-every-sensibility style of The Donald himself. Fill in the blanks and join in the veteran insulting, race-baiting fun! 

Ladies and and Gentleman of the [adjective] state of [New Hampshire, Iowa, or Ohio], today I want to share my vision for America.

We need to make sure that the [ethnic group] that come to this country do not continue to [offensive generalization]. These people are [derogatory adjective], and are responsible for [high percentage not backed by statistics] of the [criminal acts] in America today.

Those who oppose me, like [person with actual political experience] are [third-grade level insult], and, I've heard, have a history of [hurtful accusation]. For six years, they have kowtowed to President Obama, who is a loser and a [demeaning remark that borders on racism]

Show your support for our campaign by wearing this classy [article of clothing] that says: [meaningless jingoistic slogan]. Together we can make America [adjective] again.

I am a [antonym of ridiculous] man, with [antonym for cynical] reasons for running for President, and my success proves that the Republican party is [word that doesn't mean fucked]. Thank you. 

Written by Donald McCarthy and Matthew Guerruckey